Reframe Your World
I hate to break it to you, but we don’t have control of life, instead we must reframe it…
“The Greatest Discovery Of All Time Is That A Person Can Change His Future By Merely Changing His Attitude.”
William James
What if we could reframe our world?
Like taking an old picture from the wall, which has become so familiar that we no longer notice it, it’s now just an ingrained part of the space.
But if we were to take it down… reacquaint ourselves with it… dismantle it… wipe away the dust and cobwebs and reframe it with a beautiful new trim, well, it might just have the power to reinvent the whole room!
What if we could do the same with our experiences… find a new way to see them?
I was having a deep conversation (my absolute favourite kind) with a dear friend last week, and the topic was grief. And she said to me, “Grief is a privilege!”
… I’m sorry, come again?!
Yes, ‘Grief is a privilege’.
OK, so you may be thinking, “Errrm, it doesn’t blinking well feel like a privilege! It’s painful, it hurts, it’s blinding, it’s sharp and suffocating…!”
How can we feel privileged about such an intense, complex and uncomfortable emotion?
And then she elaborated…
“To feel grief is to have felt LOVE.”
And that is where the privilege comes from.
If you have loved someone or something so much that their loss leaves you grieving, then you have been lucky enough to have experienced LOVE.
My friend had fostered an antidote to reframe the indescribable grief; instead of being consumed by the loss, what if we turned it around to focus on the gratitude…
This alternative view may not be easy, or instant, and it doesn’t eradicate the pain, but it may just soften the edges and blunt the barb that hooks into our existence.
Research consistently confirms that GRATITUDE benefits our PSYCHOLOGICAL WELLBEING!
Reframing my cancer
When I realised that I could reframe my cancer diagnosis, well, that is when everything began to change for me…
That’s when I was able to accept my diagnosis…
I did not see it as suffering, I began to see it as a blessing and an opportunity…
That’s when I began to use it for better… for change…
That’s when I started to feel empowered…
That’s when I felt like I had some control!!
Not control of the fact that cancer was happening to me, but that I could control how I saw it, how it affected me, and if I chose to let it conduct my life!
Not heard me mention my unhealthy lust for control before?… Well, check this out - you’re in for a treat!
And so, I forged a mantra:
“I don’t see what cancer has taken from me, I see what it has GIVEN me!”
A new view of life…
A profound sense of appreciation for what I have…
A way of living that makes me grateful for every single day…
A sense of ease and being more present in the moment…
The courage to take risks…
The confidence to try things, seize opportunities and not be scared of getting things wrong or (shock horror) making a fool of myself!
A code of conduct I still live by (apart from the odd blips whereby I stumble down the unavoidable pot holes of life!).
So how about you?
What elements of your life would you like to reframe?
And how could you do that? It doesn’t have to be big and grand, start small…
Why not let me know in the comments below or message me here:
Take care and much love,
Julie x
Really appreciate this reminder as I have had to "reframe" a bit myself. Bless you on your journey.
So beautiful, Julie!! I can choose to reframe the aspects of my life that I have been seeing as difficult or "not working" or "not what I want" as lifting me up, teaching me...challenges that will ultimately upgrade my life. 🙏