You're not alone
So this is something I feel a lot of us need to hear right now… “You’re not alone” 💗
“One Day You Will Tell The Story Of How You Overcame What You Went Through And It Will Be Someone Else’s Survival Guide”
Brené Brown
So, I’ve been doing a fair bit (aka heck of a lot) of reflection lately, mostly around the past 6 months, since my cancer diagnosis (surprise, surprise).
And one thing I keep coming back to is support and connection – not just for me but for Steve and the boys too.
I keep reminding myself that I’m not alone in this!
We’re not alone in this!
One thing that has made a huge difference to me is the support I feel from others.
When I connect and share with other people, I feel so comforted… and uplifted… and stronger.
It reminds me that I’m not alone on this planet.
It reminds me that I’m not alone in this experience.
It reminds me that I’m not alone.
I am just one of over 3 million people living with cancer in the UK.
I am one of over 50,000 people diagnosed with breast cancer in 2023.
And one of over 10,000 women under the age of 50 diagnosed with breast cancer last year.
And these are all in the UK alone… just think how many people around the world are experiencing what I’m experiencing right now!
And I want to extend this message to you… you’re not alone.
Whatever you’re experiencing… dealing with… thinking… or feeling, I guarantee there are other people out there who are going through something very similar.
Whether it’s depression, divorce, gambling, sexuality, health, abuse, grief, addiction, money, anxiety… you’re not alone!
Whether you’re in need of personal connection, virtual connection, reading other people’s stories or seeking support from a charity or professional organisation… you’re not alone.
And when we realise this it can provide us with a much-needed sense of comfort and reassurance…
So how have I felt less alone these past 6 months?
I’ve shared my story.
I’ve connected with other people who have had similar diagnoses.
I’ve read other people’s stories.
I’ve scrolled through charity websites.
I’ve sought out online groups where I can hear other people’s experiences.
How do you find support to help you cope with your experiences?
And I’ve spent some time recently thinking about what makes a difference to our lives and how we cope with the things that are thrown our way…
We may seek advice and support from others…
We may share with close friends we trust…
We may have family we can reach out to…
We may seek professional guidance…
We may seek others who share and understand what we’re going through…
Essentially, we seek support and connection.
It can be so easy to look around a room full of people and think “well none of them are dealing with the same as me, they don’t have this worry or obstacle to overcome…” but the truth is, we just don’t know.
And even if not there in that room, then somewhere not too far away there probably is someone dealing with something very similar.
The truth is, we’re not so good at openly discussing or sharing our struggles, and so we never really know what others are contending with, unless they choose to share it…
So, here I am sharing another real and honest struggle for me right now… Parenting (or rather lack of it at the minute!)
Just the other day I stood on the playground and said to Steve, “How does everyone else do this?” It’s bl…inking hard!!
There’s forever a new phase to be contending with… new behaviours to be battling… new situations to be navigating, and sometimes you just wonder… how does every other parent cope with this?
Doesn’t it often feel like everyone else has it together and is at the top of their game…
Well, let me tell you, not over here!
Here are some of my current parenting woes:
Fussy eating – between the two of them I’ve been in the ring with the heavyweight known as “meal-time madness” for about 10 years now! I have long since lost my passion and creativity in the kitchen… the critics are brutal!
Boundaries – I know this is such an important one, but honestly I am really struggling with this at the moment, particularly around screen time and bed times! I’m struggling to find the energy and the strength that is needed…
Cost – goodness me the cost of children (I’m talking raising not purchasing!) We’ve noticed a big dent since ‘E’ went up to secondary school, and we hit the £100/month milestone just for bus fare and dinner money alone… needless to say we’ve had a chat and packed lunches are now a firm favourite!
And it’s so easy for us to fall into the berating self-critical role, putting ourselves down, scolding ourselves, but what if we took a minute to be kind to ourselves, acknowledged how hard this is right now, and how we’re trying our best in the circumstances… and give ourselves a little self-love and compassion, it could make all the difference.
Because this is hard!
So, for anyone who may need to hear this right now… you’re not alone 💕
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